Seasons
by Muffins Planned
Summary: House watches Cameron change with the seasons. Every chapter is a new season.[Complete]
1. Winter

**Seasons**

(AN: I know I should be updating the sequel to the last peice of his heart and never ending struggle, but my fingers itched for a new story, and here it is, maybe not as angsty as my other story's, but it's the only thing I can write! I'm not so good with fluff, we clash! So this is an four parter, will update everyday if nothing gets in the way, lol)  
Disclaimer: If House was mine, would I sitt here and write this story then?

_Winter  
_She looks tired when she walks inside the conference room- late is no need to add since he is there before her- but she always looks tired one way or the other during one point or the other at winter, mostly at the end of it, he do know his employees better then they think.

The snow is falling outside and he finds a comfort in the quiet, as much as he likes to anoy and make noises, he is fond of the quiet, when the world almost seemes as if it is standing still, no worries in the world. Ever since that case they had months ago, with that baby that had reached out of the womb and wrapped it's tiny hands around his finger he'd felt something, he'd changed, it suddenly dawned on him that maybe he wanted to have a kid after all, maybe they weren't so bad.

He finds her sitting in the conference room long after her shift ended, it wouldn't have surprised him if they actually had a case or if she had work to do, but she only sat there, staring off into space, out to the winter wonderland, her expression wasn't thoughtfull, happy or sad, it was grave, empty, hollow. He'd been stunned by the sight, impressed even, and he'd looked at her for what felt like forever. Suddenly she blinked, the world coming back to her. She turned and looked at him, and the spell had been broken.

When he one morning arrives early to hide from Cuddy and then hopefully aviod a new case and a confrontation, he sees her sitting on one of the hard chairs, resting her head in her palms while looking out of the window and off into the snow land, it must be something that triggered memory's, because she does at it so often now. She looks tired, it has been weeks and she still looked tired.

It is too cold for him to ride his bike, he doesn't want to have ice for fingers and face, so he is stuck with his car. He walks out of the hospital later then usual one day, and does something he doesn't usually do, he looked around the front of the hospital and sees her sitting on the parkbench outside the hospital. He asks her what she was doing out there, and she answers that she is thinking, she likes thinking outdoors, he tells her if she does anymore thinking she will be a ice sculpture by the end of the night, she only smiles at him and says something he can't hear or make her repeat. He leaves her sitting on the bench.

One day she comes in and she has cut her hair, it is short, stopps at the middle of her neck, it looks good, and with the bangs it looks even better, it frames her face. It is strange to see her in such short hair, it takes atitude to pull it off, but she somehow manage without the attitude.

Without the hair hanging in her eyes he see's the sadness that always creeps into her eyes when she isn't busy with something, he can't bare to see it so he tries to keep her busy all the time, he thinks she knows this, and she sometimes gives him looks of apreciation.


	2. Spring

(AN: So thank you for the review (you know who you are), and enjoy chapter two: Spring,

_Spring_

It almost is like she melts away with the snow, she starts to fade into the backround, the only time she is heard is during a differential, when she over hears a conversation between him and his mother about his childhood she doesn't ask question, only looks at him for a few seconds, her eyes viod of emotion, not the storm of sympathy and sadness that he expected to see when she would find out, her eyes showed what he wanted, numbness, but it didn't suit Allison Cameron.

The spring has a slow start, the snow insists to stay, and he almost believes that they will live with snow forever this time, this time it's not going away.

It's scary to look at her now, she is not herself, she is a diffrent person, he wonders what has happened, it has to be something bad, people just don't change like that, they can't change that fast, it's not possible, he tells himself that she is acting, she is acting so good that she herself believes it. Ignorance is a bliss.

He finds her one day drawing blood from herself, he steps up to her, knowing that it can be rather difficult at times. She looks at him wordlessly, feeling her tense up at his touch, he tried to make it as quick as possible, and not drag out on it just to feel her under his fingers just a while longer. That's when he notices a scar on her vrist, he never noticed before because she always wears longsleaved sweaters, and he can't resist to touch it, she snatches her arm to her, and rubs her vrist as if he burned her. He pulled it back to him, and looked at it, it was a straight line, and then looked at her.

"If you wanted to kill yourself you should've cut a deeper and longer cut" then he lets go of it, and she pulls it towards her, and looks at him with tears in her eyes. She doesn't say anything, and that scares him that she doesn't defend herself, that she probably had tried to kill herself, or that she had cut herself to kill herself, but stopped in the last minute. She leaves him wordlessly.

He pulled into his parking space one day- handicap of course- just by the last pile of snow around PPTH, and see's her sitting on the same bench as she had done just a few weeks ago, it's strange how fast the snow can melt. She is crying, he can see that from where he is sitting in his car, she's on the phone with someone, and all she seemes to do is shake her head, she doesn't move her lips to say anything. He steps out of the car to walk up to her, she doesn't notice him.

"I don't know what to do mom" she says suddenly, and he decides to listen in on the conversation, the only thing she's ever hear of her familly is that she isn't an only child, she had an older brother and that she has a pair of earings that belongs to her mother. "Everything I solution seemes to be wrong" she suddenly says, and he finds himself relieved that there is some emotion left in her. "You know why mom!" she is suddenly agitated. "Oh god" she says, and stands up, he is surprised, and thinks she has seen him, but she bends over a trashcan and trows up, when she is done she cries a bit more, and takes the phone to her ear as she drinks some water, and then spits it out in the trashcan before drinking again. "I'm sorry, I just had to trow up..." her voice is tired suddenly, dragged out.

The phone call ends not so long after, and she stands up on shaking legs, and walkes inside the hospital, the last words to her mother was "I've made up my mind, and I'm not going to change it for your sake" he wonders what she what she was talking about.

She takes a day off three days later, and when she comes back she stops trowing up, it was good because he started to get worried.

She looks tired, it almost reminds him of the time she was coming down from taking meth, but this time there is no HIV scare, no drugs and no sleeping with Chase, because Chase doesn't look like he scored a night with her, they probably never will after they broke their arrengement up 6 months ago.

She stops wearing make up and new clothes, her hair isn't always smelling flowers and vanilla anymore, and she only smelles deodorant and not her citrus parfume. He wonderes what is going on, why she is so quiet and why she is changing this way. He confronts her about this, but she only glares at him, her eyes are empty, and it was the first time he see's them for days because she has been hiding them under her bangs.


	3. Summer

(AN: Thank you SO much for reviewing, for every review I've done a little "dance", hehe. Well this is chapter Summer, and Cameron is changing _again_)

_Summer_

It's warm weather and the aircoditioning is stuck on the coldest possible, and people come in from the heat and they freeze half to death, Cuddy is getting many complains.

He watches her talk with one of the men who is woring with the airconditioning on their floor, he watches her smile breifly, and he is relieved and slightly jealous because it is the first time in months that she actually smiles. He loves her smile, there is no question about it, it's the most beautiful smile in the world.

He later finds out that it was an old friend from high school that she had lost touch with, and they make dinner plans, he doesn't know if it's a date or just dinner, he isn't sure he wants to know.

She doesn't smile again.

Suddenly it get's awfully hot in the hospital, and they start to wish that it was cold again cause the heat was too much. It smells sweat everywhere and it reminds him of the gym he used to go to in college that didn't have a ventilationsystem. But she wears her sweaters like it's fucking winter, and it irritates him, it makes him sweat just thinking about it. He even demands her to take it off, and she does, and a awful scar is seen on her vrist, and she does nothing to hide it. She is suddenly very aware that she still had an affect on men that she could take advandadged of. They say nothing about the scar cause they know she got problems that are too big for them to even wrapp their minds around to ask.

She is suddenly very bold, low cut tops and high heals, she buys a new perfume that smells exotic, and her hair smells like roses again. Her make-up is like it's done by a pro, her lips looks so soft that he wants nothing more then to kiss her, sometimes they are blood red and sometimes just light pink, sometimes she pouts them to get what she wants, and he is afraid that someone is going to hurt her.

He is at a bar with Wilson, it takes him a week to get him to go to a bar with him. The bar is crowded to say the least, people on the dancefloor and in the bar, and he wished he had been the one to choose a bar, but Wilsons mind is set on finding a new Mrs.Wilson, and he thinks he might drag him out of the bar because everyone is too young for him, but then he spots her on the dancefloor wrapped up in a heated dance with a guy much younger then her. She looks hot while she dances, and he is not the only one who is staring at her from the bar, but he, like everyone else at the bar, is too intimidated by how she looks to walk up to her.

Her hair is slightly longer now, it reaches her shoulders, it looks like she has forgot to comb it that morning, but in a good way, almost too good, perfect.

The mans hands or on her swaying hips now and he has to look away, it's like watching a car crash, you know what is going to happen but you are to amazed by it to look away. He taps Wilsons shoulder, he is flirting with a twenty-something brunette, and tells him that he is heading home, Wilson has not spoted her yet, and he thinks that's good, he wished that he himself hadn't seen her.

The next day she looks great, not at all like she is hung over, and maybe she isn't, maybe she can act like that without having to be drunk. She tells him that watching from the bar isn't going to score any women, and he looks at her with big blue eyes, and wonders who had taken the stuffed bear from it's trophy shelf.

She is always changing, she went from caring with morals she stood up for to tired and non caring, and then to a quiet woman who cared nothing about how she looked and then to a sexy manipulative woman who uses her looks to get what she wants. He asks her about this and she only tells him that he should change too, he is starting to get boring.

By the end of the summer he gets the news that she is leaving, she will finish the year at PPTH and then she will start at Penn, but he calls Penn and finds out that she is not starting there, and she tells him that when she leaves she wants a fresh start, without him, and she knows that he cannot promise her that.


	4. Autumn

_Autumn_

Everything seemes to slow down when the fall comes, the summer heat stopped pressing them and making them irritated, and the clinic seems less full when people stop coming in with sunburns. The leaves doesn't look like they do it pitchures, they look depressing, brown and almost grey sometimes, the sky is grey and lets out an occational rain, the blue sky seemes to be a distant memory.

Even she starts to slow down, her tops aren't as low cut anymore, and she stops using her looks to get what she wants, and they can finally do their jobs without getting distracted.

He is relieved that she has finally come to a middle ground so he could stop worrying what she would do next, cause every step seemed to get more and more extreme, and she seemed to loose herself more and more.

She isn't the old Cameron though, she is a new woman, her eyes are always scaning the rooms she are in, she has an attitude and her morals aren't as strict as they used to be, now she is a middle ground, she is normal, too normal. She is simply damaged he realises as she walks into the conference room in October one day. She waves to Foreman and he waves back, she smiles at him, and she almost looks happy, she does the same to Chase and him, and then she looks around the room while putting her hand in her jacket pocket before pulling it off. She wears what Cameron would've worn a year ago, and he is pleased that somethings are back to normal for now, in a couple of months she is leaving for god knows where, and will probably never come back.

She gets a phone call the last day there, when she answeres she sounds like a small child on christmas day, her eyes fills with tears as she listen to the person on the other end, and she smiles, then laughs and tells the person thank you about a million times before she hangs up and laughs again. She then tells them that she is going to buy them all coffee, and that she soon is going to be back.

She is leaving, but they ignore that just for then when they sitt and drink their coffee. They look at her because it looks like she is having an innerbattle with herself, she sipps on the coffee two times before putting it down, taking two deep breathes before she starts.

"I was raped" she says suddenly, and they look at her surprised. She tells them that it happened it Februry, and House thinks back, that's when it all started, she was draged into a car, she doesn't say anything more about it, and he doesn't want to know. She tells them that she reported it to the police, but she didn't want everyone to know. She got pregnant from the rape, tells a joke that he was probably too stoned to think of a condom, no one laughs, she aborted it, her mother didn't aprove. Then she told them, when she didn't have her mothers support anymore she seeked love everywhere, and then she met a guy who told her that she needed to get help, her high school sweetheart.

Foreman asks why she tells them this now, when she kept it a secret for so long, and she tells him that they caught him today, and that she is leaving tomorrow so none of this really matters, this is her last day at PPTH.

Later when the coffee is gone, and both Foreman and Chase has left he aproches her and pulls her into a hug. She tells him that if this hadn't happened then she would have given them one more chance, and he tells her that if he hadn't been so stubborn about the fact that he didn't like her, then this wouldn't hav happened, that's when she tells him to let go of the past, it's only going to hurt him more then help him, she knows what she's talking about, and he should too.

She walks out those doors a while later, leaving him alone in his office, and he wonderes if he'll ever see her again.

He lets go of the past, but he can't help but wonder about the future, cause life is too long for him to be living in the now.

* * *

AN: I know this kind of story has been done before, but I wanted to do it through someone elses POV, the oblivious person who's watching the distruction. And I thought it would be easy to figure this one out, but now we all see that it isn't so obvious...  
Everyone who reviewed; thank you so much! Suddenly I don't mind waking up too early on a break when reviews are waiting for me!  
So the end I've changed like a million times, so... hope it was ok...  
REVIEW PLEASE make me sooo happy! 


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